Week Two: Musicals, Eliza, and Karaoke: Good. Laundry, Smelly Feet, and Vag-Poking Creepers: Bad. (?)

Friday: on Friday, Petey, A.J. (Petey's g/f) and I went to a party in our dorm, to try to meet and make friends with some of the kids who live in Campbell House. They had bought a bunch of beer and vodka and were playing Kings Cup in the kitchen. The guy that got the King's Cup had to drink a mix of beer, cider, vodka, soy sauce, mustard, and salt. FOUL. but, he drank it. FOUL. There's a lot of boys, and not many girls that hang around with this crowd (surprise)...they can be sweet and silly, but a bit immature...they're all first years, so they are 18 and fresh into college :) so they drink heavily and constantly are trying to impress one another. Entertaining, but probs not people I will be besties with.
..................................

Saturday: Friday afternoon (we need a little backstory here), the UCL Musical Theatre Society e-mailed me (I had previously written them and the Dance Club, somewhat begging for an opportunity to participate in something, but they had already cast their shows in December, lame) and said that one of their actresses had dropped out, and would I like to come audition for them in the morning? WOULD I?!?! The part available was Jenny from the musical "Company" (I know a few of you definitely are familiar with it, especially if you've seen the movie Camp-- remember the song where the weird girl poisons the bitchy girl?), and I went and sang a verse from "Ladies who Lunch" and did a quick scene, and they gave me the part!!!! I start rehearsing this coming Sunday!!! I was SO stoked to finally join a club that I like (stupid choir), and I get to hopefully make friends with them!
That afternoon, Eliza came to London! She had been traveling all over Europe after her study abroad program in Kenya ended in December, and she was flying out of London to go home on the 15th, so she came and stayed with me for a few days. Saturday night we went to the Rocket (pub) and chatted with an excellent neuro student named Dylan, who I adore (another dread-locked one...dreadlocks seem to be popular in the UK, but they do not imply that you do drugs or listen to reggae? weird). anyway, his friend wanted me to be able to dance at the pub (I told them I was a dance major as well, they were like...wha?), so at my request, he told the DJ to play Gimme More, and he did, and A.J. and I were the only ones dancing, but I would like to point out that I fucking BROUGHT BRITNEY TO THE UK, BITCHES. That's right.
Then we went to a bar in the student union, and they had karaoke!! I learned quickly that Dylan is a HUGE karaoke fan, and AJ, Dylan, and I belted out some hits like Don't Speak by No Doubt and I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing by Aerosmith...obvi. We had an absolute blast, it was such a hoot. Defs want to Dylan to be my bestie-- he's like, 6'5" and has long ass dreadlocks, and is just excellent. Eliza can attest to this, and that Kristin would love him. so would Kendall. and basically everyone.
OMG SO amazing story. so, Petey makes fun of me and says I love gay people because he caught me bouncing in my seat while watching Will and Grace (i just love jack and karen, ok?) and cuz I'm a dancer. So anyway, after eating out in Chinatown the other night, Petey and A.J. were teasing me about me wanting to walk through Soho (the "gay" area of London). We did, and I giggled and skipped along, i mean, duh, I love homos, whatever. anyway, the people we were with (other international students) looked a bit confused, but were apparently more confused than i thought, because on saturday night, I told this French Canadian guy, Pierre-Luc, who goes to UCL and is EXCELLENT, that I knew how to say something dirty in French ("I would like your penis in my vagina"-- thanks, Katie, it's really coming in handy), and he laughed but looked confused and said to me, "but wait, why would you ever need to say that?" and I said, "what do you mean?" thinking I had gotten a word wrong or something. and he goes, "I mean, you're gay, right?" I was like, "no! what makes you think that?" and he was like, "well i just thought....you were so excited to walk through Soho....ohhhh....ok....oh my god, i am so embarrassed...." he had assumed i was gay because i liked Soho!!! it was so fucking hilarious, he was like, really afraid he had offended me, i was like, dude, no worries, but i am totally going to make fun of you for it....
..........................

Sunday: hung out with Eliza's friend who live here (she used to do Grand Bethel Girls, or however you say it, too.....hahahahahaha;)) and walked all over London, haha not really, but we did walk through Bloomsbury, Leicester Square, next to Soho and Chinatown, through Trafalgar Square and all the way to Westminister. Whew!

.............................

Monday: Petey, Eliza, and I went to Camden Market, this like, market-thing (duh) with tons of cheap clothes, ethnic food, and other decorative fun things, basically the best thing EVER if you are into cheap shopping and funky stuff. Which I absolutely am. I bought pretty fabrics to put on my blank sad walls in my room, and two scarves, YES. I wanted to buy so many things...fuck you, exchange rate!!! Actually, the things they sold the most there were: winter clothing, amazing boots, ethnic food, bongs, and creepy sex toys/clothing. Basically Mikey's dream mall. Seriously....i could just see him gasping every 2 seconds and buying literally everything.
That night Eliza and I were going to go to "Slavic Madness" (the student union bar advertised Eastern European music and vodka... i mean, what more do you need?) but when we got there at like, 9:30, it was over. lame.

...........................

Tuesday: Eliza bade me farewell with her many heavy bags (haha), and I went to class. It was heavily raining and I felt frumpy, so obvi I went shopping at H&M. Seriously, people here dress so fabulously like every day. i have never seen so many cute boots, hats, and coats in my life. Seriously, boots here are like the London equivalent of California's flip-flops. Damn it. I went to the gym for the first time and discovered that it, too, smelled terrible-- WHY DON'T EUROPEANS BATHE/WEAR DEODORANT?!?! for Christ's sake. i ran angrily on the treadmill cuz all the fucking ellipticals were full.
After that I rehearsed with this jazz vocal group, they weren't as good as the choir (which isn't saying too much...), but I liked the music and they seem kinda fun, so I might stick with it, we'll see. That night I went to a club with Petey/Megan/Lauren/AJ, other international students that go to UCL, and some of the Pomona kids at Cambridge-- Caroline Flynn, Peter Kurtz, and Dorothy Shapiro! It was really cool to see them, they'll be coming out here plenty, and we'll go out there, too. The club was packed, but seriously, the music they played....it was as if they had taken the playlist from my iTunes entitled "Dance Party" (or CooterTwat Instant Sass ;)) and played it. Britney, Nelly, Timbaland, Kanye, Rihanna, and Madonna....I was going nuts. Then some fucking drugged-up guy decided to crowd surf off the stage and right onto AJ's head, poor girl. what a tool.

...........................

Wednesday: I'm quite tired today, so I just went to class (Developmental Neurobiology and Ancient Egypt in London, of course) and to my dance class (smelled even worse and moved even slower than last week-- I'm trying Level 3 next week), and made some food and relaxed in my room. LOVELY!

..........................

Thursday: slept in, did laundry (which costs like, 3 pounds to wash and dry...that's fucking six goddamn american dollars wtfffff), took Pilates with Nicole and went to the gym, did some reading for class. At night, i went to the Rocket (pub) with a ton of the international students and Pomona kids because it was Pierre-Luc's birthday. People don't normally dance in a pub, but it was a crowded night and people started dancing (thank GOD). The DJ was playing really excellent hip hop songs from the 1990s, like 112 and Tupac-- it was excellent. And he played Gimme More upon my request, after rolling his eyes like 20 times (excuse me, you clearly are wrong here). There was this super tall black guy who could shake his ass better than I can and was sassing me like no other, putting his hand in my face and ruffling my hair and shaking his ass at me, it was so f-ing hilarious and great, it was like a sass duel! until he tried to get me to go outside with him...look, when a guy can shake his ass that well, I usually kind of assume he's, well, a homo. Shit.
The kicker was when this guy came up behind me and starting dancing with me (girls, don't you just LOVE when a guy, or rather, a guy's crotch, seems to just appear behind you, without any warning or introduction? Well, that phenomenon is even more prevalent in Europe, it seems. great.). It was all fine until he turned me around and asked if I had a boyfriend (oh boy). i said no (WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING), and he says, "oh, well I'll be your boyfriend then." Really, guy? you really think that actually works on a girl? So I said, "....no. I'm not that easy, dude" and turned around. he came up behind me again, even though I had grabbed my friend Paul and given him that look that says, "please save me from this creeper behind me" (the look I often give to Katie when she sees Michael and I at a party....ZING!), and, here's the best part-- the guy proceeds to slide his hands onto my crotch, and not just like, near it, but actually on it...he like, poked my vag with his finger. I was so stunned, I shoved his hands off and clutched onto to Paul. Man, I am so fucking pissed that happened. Like, who fucking does that??!?!?! I told my other friend Pat, who had the best reaction: "He touched your lady-parts?!?!?!" He was appalled (as most people should be). I swear, wtf is wrong with some f-ing people. EW. Honestly though, probs like, 50-60% of guys are completely decent to dance with and don't try to grope you (at least not your "lady-parts"), and about 25% will try to make out with you, which is easier to avoid and less intrusive than trying to touch your vag, which hopefully will never happen again. I've gotten pretty good at sensing when a creeper is approaching and scooting away when he seems to be moving in on me....or I just dance crazily or make a really unattractive face. Seems to work. Dancing by myself or with girls (or homos) is way more fun anyway. Guess I need to hit up the gay clubs.
I also met these other UCL students that live with Lauren and Megan, one guy from Romania who was really nice, and a guy from Italy, who spoke limited English but didn't need to because his actions spoke volumes: kissing my hand, winking at me, and "woo-hoo"ing a lot. I thought, especially since he was quite attractive, that I would be tickled by him, but I was mostly just creeped out, especially when he stuck his tongue down my throat. When I kind of pulled away and smiled awkwardly, he actually had the audacity to look away and roll his eyes. I'M SORRY, LET ME JUST PULL DOWN MY PANTS FOR YOU RIGHT HERE IN THE PUB. Jesus. I was so irritated by then that I said, "Hey buddy, sorry but I'm not that easy. I'M NOT A SLUT, OK?!?!" He looked surprised and starting pleading, "I so sorry, I only kidding, just a joke, I sorry!" I was just like, whatever, let's go. I mean, wtf. I'm so over these goddamn Europeans (I know I know, not P.C., whatever, i was groped).
I did have one excellent conversation that night, however, with a very nerdy but sweet Singaporean guy (Mikey, you will LOVE this):
Him: so, this is probably a really stupid question, but since you're American, do you like Britney Spears?
Me: (my inner monologue is screaming, OMFG) OH MY GOD, OF COURSE I DO!!!! I LOVE HER!
Him (a little startled): What do you think about her as a person?
Me: I mean, she's basically mentally ill...but really, she's just going through a hard time right now.... (hahaha)
Him: I guess she is. I'm a fan of rock music, so I'm technically supposed to hate Britney, but can I tell you something? Her new album, Blackout, is so great! I really love it!

Seriously, I almost shit myself. Best conversation with a foreigner EVER, and it came completely out of nowhere.

COMING UP NEXT...

• the weekend-- crazier than weekdays, or not as crazy? Guess I'll find out...
  
• lots of people go to Paris this weekend, but not me. :( Petey, AJ, and I do tourist-y things to pass the time
  
• my first musical rehearsal on Sunday-- hope I make lots of homo BFFs!!!!!
• I get an attractive, sweet, smart, funny boyfriend with an accent...oh wait, that's definitely not going to happen. :( f-ing creepers
  

Other interesting tidbits:

• for some reason my feet smell like, a million times worse than they normally do here. Luckily my feet don't normally smell bad, really. But honest to god....maybe it is all the shoe-wearing and walking? wtf i don't know.
• I saw an item in the frozen foods section of the grocery store entitled "Pork Faggots". I seriously stood and stared at it for like, 15 seconds. I know faggot means "stick" (thanks Mikey), but....really, England? Pork faggots? HAHAHAHAHAHA
  
• I miss Mexican food, driving, friendly strangers, wearing flip-flops and sweat pants outdoors (you know how hard it is to get dressed...), and the sun, as well as best friends, dancers, my dog, and my mom. :( homesickness is beginning to set in, and I don't like it. I need to find a bestie!!!!!